NDSU Extension - Sargent County


| Share

Whining – It’s Not Just Something Little Kids Do

Whining – It’s Not Just Something Little Kids Do


People leave their jobs most often because of things that interfere with their job satisfaction. Things like people whining, for example.    

Whining brings people down. Being around people who whine can be like being around people who talk with an accent or drawl or who frequently use certain words and phrases.  We can soak it up, and before we know it, we may start whining or speaking with an accent, drawl, or certain words and phrases just like they do.

Things to avoid doing when you are with a whiner:

  • Don’t agree with a whiner (you’ll get pulled into his/her drama)
  • Don’t disagree with a whiner (you never will win the argument)
  • Don’t try to fix the issue (the whiner will keep coming back)

Things to do when you are with a whiner:

  • Do interrupt the whining and ask, “Can you give me a concrete example of that?”
  • If the whiner provides an example, say, “Let’s sit down and see if we can come up with some solutions.”
  • If the whining continues, say, “Please stop, and don’t bring that problem to me again because I can’t help you with it.”
  • Do be blunt. Say, “Just stop. That’s not appropriate here.”

Another approach is to think about what motivates the whiner and ask him/her to take the lead in solving the problem. For example:

  • Ask the person to teach others how to address the problem instead of whining about it.
  • Ask the person to lead a team discussion to brainstorm ideas for solving the problem.

Negativity, conflicts, and gossip are other things that interfere with job satisfaction and cause people to leave their jobs.  Read the NDSU Extension publication, “Addressing Gossiping, Whining, Conflict and Negative Attitudes” to learn more.  It is available online at  https://www.ag.ndsu.edu/publications/leadership/addressing-gossip-whining-conflict-and-negative-attitudes/fs1816.pdf.

Photo Source:  https://pixabay.com/illustrations/cooperate-collaborate-teamwork-2924261/   (downloaded 10/5/20)



Creative Commons License
Feel free to use and share this content, but please do so under the conditions of our Creative Commons license and our Rules for Use. Thanks.